While I was driving to work this morning the radio spilled storied about the deliberation on gay marriage. The discussion is so old so I usually ignore the topic. Today, though, was different. I am a lesbian, married to a woman and we have a son who we adopted seven years ago. We are responsible, tax-paying, hard-working people and I do believe that we, like everyone else in this world deserve the right to be happy and be with the person we love.
This morning the discussion was regarding a federal case that would make all states recognize same-sex marriage or not. Growing up, you may start thinking about who you may marry someday and none of your dreams will have anything to do with legal rights that come with being married. I still don’t have a full understanding of ALL the rights that come with marriage but the discussion today hit close to home.
The radio host spoke about a lesbian couple that adopted four kids. The couple lives in a state that does not recognize same-sex marriage so one woman adopted two kids and the other woman adopted the other two. I guess it made sense to them at the time, but the question now is what would happen to two of the kids if their adoptive mom passes away? I learned today that according to adoptive laws, since the state does not recognize the union, those kids would not stay with their mom. What sickens me the most is that these kids would be displaced on top of having just lost one of their moms and all because the union is not recognized. The radio host’s exact words were that their mom would be a legal stranger to them and have no right to keep them.
If this case rules against same-sex marriage, states would have the right to overturn any laws that may already be in place in their state that legalize civil unions or same-sex marriage now. This terrifies me. My mind started racing thinking about what additional safeties I can put in place so that our son can stay home if anything happens to one of us. Even more than that, I want my wife to be able to keep the house if anything happens to me. Right now, the house is under my name. I want her to have rights to me and decisions that pertain to me if I am in the hospital. It is scary to realize that some strangers have the power to turn my wold upside down.
It is time to educate myself on all things that have to do with marriage rights and benefits and also to consider adding more legal protection just in case law makers decide to change their minds and the laws again.